Hannah Berner: Al Dente Dicks & Faking Dirty Talk [VIDEO]

Hannah Berner, welcome back to Call Her. Daddy. This is incredible, because you did not have.

When I think of jorts for women, I think of jorts that are just like, kind of, the color of my jeans.

I was like, yeah, wait, look into the camera.

Someone who was jealous of my long torso, because it goes on forever, and I've learned to embrace it, a la Britney Spears. Wait, was it a woman or a man? It was definitely one of my good friends who was like, well, Hannah has a long torso. And I go, has everyone been talking about my torso for years and no one told me?

I need. someone I'm going to feel so comfortable with that will, like lights out, kill it. So if I fail, if I freeze, if I fuck up, this person can just like take the thing and run with it.

I really felt like a teammate.

I risked my whole body. My lower back was fucking killing me from the flight. Anyway, we'll talk about that later, but then it's so loud from the cheering. We can't hear each other. This is what we need to get into.

So, picture this. I'm asking Hannah something about like dating. And all I remember is you start speaking and I read your lips and you say bondage. And I am literally like, where the fuck is she going with this? And then the crowd is laughing, but I have no idea what you're saying.

So I start fake laughing. I'm like,

Like the high was incredible though.

We're going to talk about the Netflix special a little bit later, because I want to go through it all. But first we're just going to have a good combo. Let's get silly. I just want to get silly with you. And I have so many things I'm thinking about for, like the summer girlies that are listening.

I think we have a lot to talk about, first and foremost, because maybe if someone hasn't listened to our previous episodes, could you just share from your recollection? It's okay. If you don't remember, like, what are some of your like best?

Like I. go to Wisconsin and girls will be like, I fucked Bucky too. Like it's become a, yeah. Hannah fucked the mascot. If you're reading contextual clues,

But the funniest thing about Bucky, which I don't know if I even fully explained, was that like, he rejected me in the end. Like he was one of those like guys who you're like, Oh, I'm doing like a, make a wish. And then he hurts you more than anyone. I go, this was a, what the fuck? Like.

one of my most embarrassing moments was. I got drunk. Okay. I remember I was going there for the summer and I was so excited to see him. Like, you know, when you're playing music, just like dreaming of all the moments you guys are going to have together.

I was like, I have a boyfriend this summer. I have a boyfriend. And I got drunk and I went up to him at the KK, the bar, where he was the manager. I know he was a mascot. And no, I know he was like double life, but like Hannah Montana, no jaw.

Anyway. So jaw. Yeah. So I was like, this is going to be easy. Like we can do this.

Shout out. He DMs me sometimes. I love you. I'm not lying. You know that you're saying it's like, just let's just say he wasn't studly, but he was funny and nice.

And I was like, Hannah, this is what you need. And then I go up to him. Now, this was very specific for the time I go, we don't have to be Facebook official, but like, you can date me. Don't hear from him for two weeks to the point where, like, I'd go out. and like, you know, when you can't enjoy the conversation with your friends, cause you're just like this literal mole rat of a man who's running around, like skipping as a mascot, is not responding to me, dude, those things make you grow.

They, and we, me and him laugh about it now. And he's like, I was young. I was scared. Whatever it was. What is Bucky up to now?

But looking now like your early twenties, it's so chaotic. And I feel like the girls are trying to establish like a nice connection with a guy. Guys are trying to like show off for their friends. We want two different things. How did any relationship ever work out in your twenties?

It's impossible. It's literally.

A whore. What? How did he have the time? His friends with the hockey guys. Okay.

So I'm picturing you, showing up to one of the games that he's got his full like mascot duty on. And are you like walking past the mascot? Like, do you know what I mean? When you're like?

And then he's like, fuck off, bitch. And you're like, Oh,

Not you.

I've ran through the mascots. Ran. At least a light jog, I would say.

Are you sleeping in your bed? Like getting in bed at seven? Like what's our vibe?

You're at a 12.

. Everyone else is at a four. We need you to calm down. So then I would be like, Oh, I thought we were getting, And then I was like, start getting tired. And then at some point the night I'd be at a four and everyone else's blackout.

And then I get sleepy. So I'm like the worst. I'm just not a.

I basically was like, there are so many days that you're there. The cameras go up and they're like, okay, we're having a theme party. And you're like, Oh my God. And I, I don't like theme parties and I don't like partying either. I hate a theme party.

I hate a group of people that I don't know. And you like. the last time I blacked out was on reality TV. But if you black out, you have to during the parties, the only way you could get your mic off is if you jump in the pool. So if I'm ever in the pool, that means I'm blackout, floating around, just like farting in the pool, just hoping that they don't ask me to have a conversation.

Cause they'll be like, Hannah, come up and like fight with this person. I'll be like, I'm in the pool. I can't get out, Hannah. Oh, so I got in big trouble once. Why?

So the first thing they say, they're like, the only rules are like, if you're going to go in the pool, take off your mic. That's the only rule. And they treat us like we're kindergartners at a summer camp. They'll be like, I'll be talking to someone like, I don't want to go in the pool. And they'll be like, Hannah, if you want to go to the.

pool, are you going to go in the pool? And I'm like, I'm hungry. I don't go eat salami. So like, they're just dealing with like toddlers. So then at one point I decided to do like a sprinting cannonball.

Cause I love attention. And I was like, guys, watch this. I start running. I do a cannonball. I land, I get up.

Everyone's looking at me. Like I just drowned their baby. Everyone's like, and I'm standing there and I'm like, was it bad? Was it bad? The mic guy, audio guy, starts running, knees up, like Olympic, sprinting towards me, hops in the pool and like yanks me out.

And he like, takes it off me and, like huff puffs, leaves. And they're like, okay, he's really mad at you. I'm sorry. It's a mic pack. Apparently they're like really expensive.

And the mic person, like it's their own mics. Oh, you little piece of shit. So he was like this dumb, drunk bitch. And I remember like seeing him the next day and be like, I'm sorry. I was a little bit drunk.

And we laugh about it now, but like, I was never more scared in my life. Um, whiskey dick.

And I, that needs to be normalized. You know exactly.

Same thing. Or, just like Matt, the macaroni that, like you, put in the microwave. That's like guy's dick sometimes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The smushing of a guy's dick into your vagina.

People don't talk about it enough. Cause, then how does it also feel so not good when it's so innocent, but just feels like when I used to be.

What the fuck are you doing? And then all of a sudden I'm completely sober and I see his little weenie dried up. It's just, I think let's give advice to the daddy gang. The next time that Willie takes your pants off and little Willie is al dente and you want him to have a little cream sauce coming out. Dicks are like cats sometimes where it's like, if you.

Cause he'll be like, don't look at me right now. Like I'm happening. And you're like, are you at? Don't, don't ask about like, so you have to like, look away and like, don't be intimidating and don't put pressure on him. It's like a whole.

Like, we get so fucking busy. And even if we're in the same house, we're not traveling, we're in the same house. We're so fucking busy. The reality is we go through.

And then his mom is visit, I just can't. And then it's his birthday. And you know what I mean? Oh my God, I've done this with my brother so many.

And I was really just bleeding.

And then you literally, you're.

And she's like, just never do anal. And I was like, why? And she's like, I've been leaking for five hours. And to that day, I've been scared. Like, but that's.

I attempted it once in the shower, which is wait, I don't know. Don't? do sex in the shower. Period. Water is not lube.

Water is not lube. It will be bloody. Don't. My friend told me like it is so fucked up. You tried anal in the shower.

Cause I guess I was thinking like, my butt's clean and whatever. It was so painful. I also want to talk about, there's so many sex things that you try to do that you don't like. everyone lost half their virginity,

No, he literally grazed my lip. And then I was in pain.

And you're like, unless the blood everywhere was calm, I don't know what just happened. And I don't want to do that again. And then he's like always accidentally hits your butthole during doggy. And you're like, what is going? And your butthole is like, has the reflexes of a Ninja.

And we'll be like, like, it is, there's so much stuff. And I do have to say, for all the younger girls, like my cousin was like going off to college. And I was just like, I just wanted to hold her, because everyone has bad experiences. I mean, it's so hard. I remember once there was this guy who was like so hot.

Cause, that's a problem. The hot ones does not mean the rest of it is going to be okay. If anything, it's worse. Cause. girls have not taught them.

They're untrained. I remember he was like trying to touch me and it just wasn't good. And I didn't like his vibe. And he like, I could, I could smell cigarette on his breath. And I just remember being like, Ooh, I can't deal with cigarettes.

And he's like, what are you talking about? I'm like, Ooh, I just can't. I don't like cigarettes. I just like it. And he kept chasing me around.

I'm like the cigarette thing. I don't like it. But you know, that's just like turning him on more that you're being like, no, I'm good. Just throw astrology at them. Just be like, it's giving, I'm a Libra.

You don't get it. It's just, it's a Libra thing. Like I'm an Libra, but just say it. Like. I literally have a bit about that.

I didn't put in the special where I'm like, guys hate cats and astrology. So just look at them and be like, my cat's name is Clyde and his rising moon's Aquarius. He'll be like, okay, nevermind. Thank you. Check, please.

Weaponize astrology to get him away from you. Weaponize astrology. Matt Reif, that shit.

Do it. Use our knowledge of what they're afraid of. We're afraid of getting murdered. They're afraid of astrology. Use your weapon.

We ride at dawn.

Go watch on Netflix now. Mother fuck. How much does that say?

I'm obsessed with you. I missed you so much. No, I love you. No,

I'm, I'm, my face is hurting.

Quick question. What do you think about retired athletes?

You're like, put them behind the bar, put them behind the bar or just take them out to a field.

Yeah,

they're like, Ooh, my Kansas road beef. They now have like less to lose where, like a lot of guys, although they're protected. sometimes they're like, Ooh, but when I get in trouble, then I can't play tomorrow. I feel like the retired athletes are now just in this, like sedated state of just like entitlement, but no purpose. And so they can hone in on you and just be like, you're my purpose.

And I'm like, no, no, no, no, get away from me. And they become psychotic. I lived across from one. Can't even start. No, I can't tell the story, because he's literally the most ill person on the internet.

And he basically was the most psycho person I've ever met in my life. And I was like this, I'll tell you after, but it was one of the scariest moments. However, athletes are scary too, because you know what? I'm in New York city. This is actually not that long ago.

It was like towards the end of my New York days. And I am hooking up with this hockey player. It's one night I, we had followed each other on social media. We met in college a couple of times. I had maybe sucked his penis once.

That was kind of, it was just a cow, an appetizer. No, this was not a palate cleanser. This dick is so fucking scary and large and curved. No, I hate that. So I like the curve.

The curve was fine for a blow job, but it went, it's either left or right. I can't remember. Okay. So I'm in New York city. I run into him at a club immediately.

I'm like, he's one of the hottest people in the NHL. I'm like, you're so fucking hot. Let's fucking do this. But I'm convinced he has a girlfriend. I'm like, wait, isn't your Instagram like full of this like girl?

that is like your girlfriend. And he spends the entire night convincing me that they're not.

So fucking true. He, I'm like, but also, I'm not an idiot. I've dated.

So I get super drunk. And then I'm like, you know what? He's so fucking hot. I'm going to, Oh, I can't even say it loud. I'm going to trust him.

Disgusting. Alex, we go back to his place. We start having sex. Just do it. I'm sure she's not your girlfriend anymore.

I choose to believe this man. After like three hours, we go back and his curved penis comes out and we start having sex. and a blow job was one thing. Cause his mouth can do great things. This curved penis is so large.

Hannah, I start bleeding. I am in so much pain and I just kind of stop it. I leave. two months later. He's engaged.

How the fuck did this man explain blood?

His sheets are just red everywhere. And now this man is married to this woman. So praying for you. Praying for her. Like it's just.

Oh, I want to give the guy credit. This guy basically said that he realized, and he's like, I got to tell all the guys this, cause we didn't know. Do you know? when girls say, I want you to come. It means they want you to stop.

Like they want you to be done. Like I thought they were into it. Whenever you go, can you come in me? I want you to come. Oh, my God.

Can you, we are so big. Can you come right now? She's done. She's already thinking about what she has to do that night. She's thinking of her chores.

She's texting all the girls in the room, nodding. And the guy was like, wait, men did not know that. And, like, you think we, just like, we're like, you know, make this better. We're saying we want this to end Hannah.

Mom has to work. Okay. Mom has Pilates. This is so fucking accurate and.

Come for me.

And literally if, and it's usually in doggy. And when you're in dog, you know, if you're face to face, you're like, come for me. When you're in dog, you're like, yes, come for me. Come for me. Your face is literally like, I will murder.

You're like, okay, let's just Hannah.

I'm sweating too. Is it a little hot? I get so hot in here. I'm sweating. Are you sweating?

I'm always sweating. Hannah, imagine me, on my wedding. I was literally like, why did I fucking choose a tropical location?

Have you discussed, though, like?

I feel like it's been like so subtle with you, but like you're not as tan as you were. Oh, I'm getting a spray tan tonight.

She goes, you just called me pale to my face, but I don't think you're going as much. I'm only, I'm only, I'm not. Oh, my God. I used to. And I feel like the makeup is, is more subtle, but like, was it conscious?

or were you? just, as you got older, you were like, oh, I fuck with my face. I relate to, oh, I think you,

I had, and I probably still do have, eyebrow blindness. If you look at pictures of me from college, it, it started to get scary. Like it was just insane, huge, black. It was, it was too much,

Facetune blindness is such a thing. It was insane. But back then we didn't have Facetune. So I was like using pick monkey. Um, so I was like on my web browser in STEM.

I was literally coding and making my lips bigger. Okay. We didn't have face that new horse. I was.

But you know what? Cheers. It made me a lot of money. Well, I was going to say,

Wait, what the fuck? I wore a tie once on Giggly Squad and it was mixed reviews. She's nodding, but you feel. so... What did you wear it with?

Oh, I fully looked like an eighties salesman. I wore it just with like a button down. Like I went full, like, I want to feel like how a guy feels with a tie. You feel, first of all, you mansplain. You start like explaining things you have no idea about.

Just like shut the fuck up. I'm sorry. I wasn't listening to you speaking. I feel like there's like a shrill noise. So the tie, like you feel like you have a dick, cause it's like hanging around and you, and you like, you gotta, you gotta make sure it's not like, yeah, you gotta keep it in its place.

You feel powerful. And I just think a girl with it, like you with tie, it's like hot. But do you have to wear a collared shirt? Could I wear like a tank top with a tie? You could wear a tank top.

That is very Avril. Yeah. But like, I think it's a... Go for it. Yeah.

I think you, I mean, you know her now. You could text her if she is Avril.

Did you start the conspiracy theory? And I'm literally thinking back to my username, like XXXXX. I was probably in those.

I'm like, what the fuck? I feel bad. I was like, and I love her, though. She's like, that's like the least of my worries. Like, if that's the biggest rumor about me, I'm like that you're dead and then you came back at someone else.

you have a body double. I guess that would be kind of cool. imagine if that was the fucking rumor about you. honestly, I would die for those.

where are the pennies? we like a new Chappelle room change in a while. well, that was very rich of you, but if I was never giving me change, can you pay me in quarters?

I want to.

oh you don't, you don't Delta headphones. I could we strangle myself to death with the amount of Delta headphones I have knotted up in my back? I could definitely kill a small squirrel I have lying around. it would definitely the whole ocean would. every fish would die with the amount of Delta head.

we, we, I feel like the Delta.

I don't shower. listen to me. your intrusive thoughts are so crazy and.

I can't find them anywhere. I'm like I'm so rich and I have.

that's actually natural. I don't know why I'm gonna blame this on my ears. I talked aloud, but then I was like maybe I need to get like my ears checked. you're just annoying. the doctor's like just shut the fuck up.

so I go and they're like oh you see a little earwax. they do this thing where they like, pour it into me, whatever, and it's basically like a honeycomb looks like it came out of my fucking ear and I was like holy shit, that's been in my ear. then I kept getting a. what's it called a?

yeah, this is giving like. I like. I can't text right now. I'm at the point where, like they've grown out the last amount where I have to. I actually have never gotten fake nails before.

is this the longest you go? yeah, and she put him on. I've never gotten full. cuz I like. I killed the whole family.

yeah, you break one. you're like fucking. yeah. and I was like how do you get them off? and she's like oh, it's a whole process.

you have to like soak for three days, like it's a whole thing. you're like getting it's like.

you've seen those videos.

oh my god, what did I feel? how did we get here? you're what I I did. I. I took us off Delta kill.

air pods. have I stolen? I was dating this rich guy at this point he was pissing me off. I knew we were gonna when they're.

and he's definitely being sus. we weren't even dating. but I'm like he's cheating with other women, blah blah. so I start to panic and I can't sleep. so I start walking around his apartment and then I get this crazy idea I'm like fuck him.

I'm gonna fucking take something from this apartment like fuck.

I see the Rolex and I can't afford shit at this point I'm like, okay, I can't take that. so I'm looking around, looking around, and then finally this is the most petty thing, because it's so stupid and it might as well have been headphones, Hannah, I find this box that has not been opened and it's a GoPro, and I look at it and I'm like, oh, I pick it up, I put it in my purse and I fling my purse over my fucking shoulder and I steal this man's motherfucking GoPro. I haul myself a cab, I get home and I put the box on my decks and I'm like ha, there you go, motherfucker, and I never used the GoPro and I would look at it and I would. I did.

you could do more time that he has.

distracting you from like our connection. I hate you. you just say you don't really know a person until you've seen them in a room trying to find their remote. fuck. take going to a restaurant, seeing how they treat the waiter, hide their remote and see how they act.

that is the real person right there, oh cuz.

we don't have time to solve those issues.

any man who blocks you. that's an egg. it's so because I didn't even do anything to him and I'm like oh my, I check and he still has me blocked and I'll be like she's still that girl, she's that girl. that's literally the craziest.

I'm dying and they're like is it worth it? and I'm like it's fucking worth it, bitch. so I don't. and the thing is, sometimes you get this motivation from anger. so good.

but the best part is when you get to the point that you forgot why you're even mad at them and then people are like this is your time like go on, call her daddy, drop the name, call him out, tell, show the receipts. you don't care anymore, you're literally like we.

I said he always walks in front of me by like five feet like I. he controls everything, like when I get to see him, all that stuff. and I was young, I was like 26, he was older and she goes you're not going to his apartment. yeah, and this is like two days ago. she's like he's the best she goes.

you're calling the picking him up, calling the phone, calling him. you're picking the phone to call. you're calling your phone pick up.

and I was like I was like. and she goes, I'm sitting with you, we're doing it right now. and I called him and I said, like I want to end it and he's like what are you talking about and what? and he I was like okay, like I want to, I can't do this anymore. and then another guy was really fucked up.

that's a mind. fuck another guy which is so fucked up. he was so sweet, so nice, and my I was like 23, 24, and my mom was just like Hannah he's not it. and like I really liked him. he was so nice, but like, I knew deep down that it wasn't right.

he wasn't the one who wanted to marry, but he was so nice to go, just so and like he was great. my mom was like mm-hmm and she was like Hannah, you're wasting time like just get out of it. we have no issues. I call him. I was like I think it was in person.

I was like we have, because once I decide I'm out. so I was like we have to break up and he just looked at me as a saddest thing ever. he goes. so I can't like talk to you tomorrow and I remember just being like I'm sorry, like my mom's, a savage, and I'm so scared of her, and she wants the best for me, and she knows big picture. and I can't waste my time with you, cuz you're kind of a loser.

you can talk to Lenore, you can tell like, but she's over it. but then I've had times where she one guy she liked that I wanted to break up with. I waited for her to go on vacation and I broke up with him when she was on vacation because I want her to enjoy her vacation comes back, I go. I broke up with him. she was like I'm obsessed.

I think that's like the most fun thing.

I'm like mom. we're trying to not get sued. mom also like I'm married mom. calm down, she's like, but I wrote them all down. I have it in my notebook from your college days when you would call me.

I knew you would need this stories one time like.

but my mom is nodding, listening be like yep. I want my daughter to be with a fucking hot like cuz. mom. my mom and I are very independent. we're gonna have a man in our life.

they need to be an asset and good to look at period. I do have to say I tell my mom everything too, and I posted cuz. I was so excited to go on color diet today and I was like guys, what I'm going to? big podcast, which one do you think it is? and I put like the little thing where people can comment.

they're like Rogan. my mom goes. call her daddy. she knows I don't like mom she's.

can we listen to older women, mm-hmm, like older women know so much. you know everything. so it's like you have this asset that is. your mother came out of her user and ask a ton of questions and yes, I know some moms like they. you know it's not always great, and then I surround if she's a fucking nice.

that's what, like things in my past, have annoyed me. where people like she's obsessed with him or whatever, like I'm, I'm never put myself in that position, cuz I am prideful and insecure. I get it so like when people like guys in the public. I'm like that man has never made me laugh. he's like a noise, the fuck out of me and like I just want.

people like she's such a bitch like yeah, why don't we gang up on the man you?

a man who's hot with no personality is not your friend and never will be, and.

um, you need to explain to me how did this.

you're funny, you're perfect. everyone loves you, which is like also not true. or you can feel like they put mud on you and everyone just sees you with this stuff on you and you're trying to shower it off and you feel misunderstood. and feeling misunderstood was like my biggest fear, and the universe was like let's do it to you. and I was in definitely a place, but it I was in a dark place, but I never felt stuck.

I just was like okay, we got a pivot, we got a pivot. I was in this like where's the next thing? and tick-tock was this new crowd where, like people, don't know who I was and I got to, just like therapeutically, I would go on stage after reality TV and I would, in my head, be like I hope these people don't hate me, and I was, but I had this drive to show them like I want them to, at least not like me, because they don't like my comedy, which is such a like more peaceful perspective, like if you don't like the art and like cool, we're expressing ourselves and also and I needed to get better and when I was on stage, it's fucked up, but my mind is very doesn't shut up. so when I was on stage, it was the only time that I wasn't repeating or trying to figure out like my past. so I got to be present in that moment telling my queef jokes, but it was like it was like my safe space.

and then comics was this crew of people who made me feel so much better about myself. they were like dying, laughing at the shit I was going through with reality TV, like I was telling them these stories. they were like I would have burned the house down. I would, and they made me feel a little more seen where you can feel in the wrong crowd. you really do feel like you're losing your mind, and that's what the point is a lot of the time.

so I I started to get this. I almost feel like hot girls. don't traditionally go, let's do stand-up comedy tonight, or let's go to the stand-up comedy club. you go with your boyfriend. but I was able to kind of cultivate this algorithm of like.

I'm biased, but like hot, successful, funny women who wanted to laugh and felt safe in their bedroom, laughing at comedy and then, with Giggly Squad and getting the girls to come out to the show, I was like oh my god, we have this like group of women coming out to comedy shows, loving stand-up and a lot of them is their first ever shows. and it was powerful. and because I was selling tickets, I didn't have to wait to like get chosen to be on lineups and stuff. I was like producing my own shows and then I started doing hand on the street where I was making friends with all these comics, and then the comedy community started embracing me in a way where I was just like. either you like me or don't.

I don't care like, I don't need you to accept me, but like because I came in with some of some followers, so some comics will be like. well, she didn't bomb in enough basements, but I'm like I want to build you. I wanted to be like Chelsea Handler-esque, where I I bring people that are talented around me. um, no matter how many followers you have, I fuck with you if you're like a nice person who's talented and it's again selfish of me to be like I. I wanted.

before you go famous, I'm gonna put you on.

now the crazy thing about this call is my agent's like Netflix wants to do a special with you. I I'm freaking out, like I have a video of me, like I was like shaking. I go to the other room and I'm like Des. I got Netflix special. he looks at me, no smile, and he goes yeah, you're not shooting that.

and I was like I'm sorry, isn't this like the goal? wait, and he goes. you have nine more months of touring and you're gonna do those nine more months because your bits are gonna be tagged up and that much better at the end of it, and you tell them you'll shoot it the latest you can possibly shoot it. so, like he's a media, he's a protector, of course, and he has done his own career where he's like. you don't rush into a special right.

but like, I love this material so much and I'm so happy that I basically told Netflix like in a year I'll do it. so they were like why and I was just like. I think I could make it even better, even though they liked it at the time. that's like. so I like.

I sat on that shit like, and I wasn't allowed. I didn't even tell page for like a month, because I just wanted to sit in it, but it was such a great moment of like. it's not about the special, it's not about cloud, it's about like putting out something you're proud of. I thank you for sharing that, because.

I was like can I watch it?

I'm gonna like have wine and Matt and I are gonna sit down. I'm gonna be sending you pictures. I'm gonna watch it. I'm so fucking excited, but you I truly am so proud of you, like I feel like when I met you, I was like oh my god, this is someone I could have been friends with my whole life. like having been athletes.

like knowing the fucking trauma that you have from being an athlete, knowing the type of person it just like builds you into, and you're like, oh my god, I'm gonna be so competitive with yourself and I think sometimes, for especially women in sports, I feel like that gets misconstrued and we've dealt with like being our worst.

I'm so proud of you, proud of you, you good, okay, talk in a couple months like have you slept right? we're like you, good, and then we're like you, ready to come on the pod. you, okay. okay, you're wearing jorts. amazing midlife crisis.

cue it now for help. I, I just am so excited for people to watch this and I feel like you from when I met you to now is what I'm saying is like you were so funny back then, but we both were insecure and of course we're both still insecure in some capacities. but, like I can't wait to watch the special because you are so much more yourself now than when I met you. you were. we were both going through it.

not that we weren't ourselves, but like you're, you're leading with, like you're so fucking talented. you are like anyone I talked to about you recently are like, oh my god fucking Hannah Burner. she's lights out. like I can't wait to see the special like you are. just I get.

but I'm turning into my dad. he loves quotes and he was. it basically is like what if your biggest dreams came true and I think you are a good example of that because you showing that, because it's kind of lonely sometimes at the top, and you showing that a girl could get a lot of attention and run a full company, like it's paving the way for other people to be like. oh, that dream is not too scary and I do feel like with this special. I really hope that more girls are gonna be like.

I'm just like Hannah, and that's how I am with my friends. wait, I like, I like fuck with this. I want to do stand-up because I have this conspiracy theory that, like women, are made for stand-up. we're gossipers, we complain, we overanalyze, like that is what stand-up is. so I just like disrupting male spaces and making men upset, and I think we write a dawn we.

I'm patient. I'm like Paige is gonna be furious when I tell her I wore jorts on. Call Her Daddy. she'd be like you fucking disrespectful cunt, but you guys have to.

I'm like you're different, Anna. it's just because you're different. I love you. thank you so much for coming on Call Her, Daddy. this was everything and more.

I love you.